Wrapping Up 2010

Here are some pictures from our December. What a fun time we have had this past month, celebrating the seaSON.
We have had two snows this past month. I wouldn't really call this first one a storm. We got an inch or so, but the kids went sledding anyways. On Christmas Eve day we got a good storm that gave us four inches of snow. It is gone now, but the kids did play in it some (not as much as they could have though).
A week before Christmas we had our annual family Christmas program. The Hayes family joined us again this year and the kids sang and played songs. They got to practice some songs that they did the next morning in the church service.

Here are the younger kids singing. They did so well and they were quite cute!

Here is our audience.

At the end the kids did an improv, acting out the Christmas story while James read it. Here are the shepherds (Jon and Jay), reacting to the angel.

Here are the kids the next morning, singing in church. I especially enjoy watching Josiah sing, he really gets into it. Usually he strums along too.

Thanks to Mrs. Whitby, the kids got to make a gingerbread house. They were more interested in eating it, than making it look nice (that's boys for ya).

I just love this picture of Jesse and Jedaiah, playing with the tree.

Our annual Christmas Eve picture that will be made into an ornament for our tree next year.

Christmas morning. All healthy and feeling good, yeah! (if you wondering, see last Christmas' post)

Jesse got his favorite gift, an electric guitar, now we can throw the broken, baby guitar away.

James' parents shower us all with many gifts. Wow!

Josh and Maw-Maw

Josiah got a real mandolin! His Mommy has wanted one for many years, now she'll get to learn too (if she can find the time).

Rachel, with her doll and matching outfits. I loved helping to pick these out for her, so cute!!

She was very happy with her knock off American girl.

'Tis the Season to be Jolly...

I am loving this season of the year. It is my favorite. Our schedule is nice and light and so we have been enjoying lots of family time at home. I love sitting by the fire, watching a Christmas movie with the kids, with our Christmas tree all lit up. It is so peaceful and warm. We are doing school just three days a week this month. On our days off we are spending the time cleaning, baking, and other fun things (well, okay, the cleaning is not so fun, but it is nice when it is done). We are also preparing for our annual Christmas program that we put on at home. This year is our third year and the kids are getting better and better at their musical abilities. We invite some friends and family to come watch and it has become a great tradition that I hope to continue on into the grandchildren years. With my shopping almost complete and my wrapping just about finished, I am enjoying these days before Christmas with peace and joy. (Now, I've got to get to work on the yearly Christmas newsletter, I've put that off long enough.) Oh how blessed we are!!

Doing Well

I saw the OB today and am doing well. I have to wait another week before I start running on the treadmill again. Until then, I will just walk briskly. I have done well to take it easy this week. Tomorrow I'm spending the day shopping, hopefully I'm good and rested up for that. Emotionally, I'm doing fine. I have waves of sadness here and there. Overall, it was a healing week and God carrying us through it all.

Celebrating Elijah James

I want to share how God has been working through this miscarriage. Sunday night I started spotting and then last night before bed, the bleeding started. Throughout the night I had some contractions, but nothing too painful. I thought I was hours away from passing the baby, but just to make sure, I got a strainer. I was very surprised when I caught the baby. I woke James up and said, "I've got him". He took him and rinsed him off, he was so tiny, about 3/4 of an inch long. Then came the placenta and that was it. I've been feeling fine. I could hardly go back to sleep at 3:00 in the morning as I marveled in awe at God's creation. I'd be happy to share more details in person, but some of you think this is already too much information.

God fulfilled His purpose for Elijah on this earth and I am blessed to have been His vessel to carry him. God has blessed me through this with His presence, His peace and His joy. He knew the number of days of Elijah's life before even one of them came to be and I am priveleged to be used by God in this way. And I am so glad I got to see our little boy and look forward to seeing him on the other side of eternity.

We celebrated Elijah's life today. This morning the kids and I painted rocks and then wrote on them. I wrote on mine his name, his dates: 8/24/10 - 11/9/10 (conception to delivery), and the words: "straight into the arms of Jesus" and "we love you". We painted one for James and when he got home at lunchtime, he wrote on his. When I saw his rock that said, "Your Daddy loves you" the tears started to come. We went out as a family, on this beautiful fall day, to the swings we have back by the woods. There James dug a hole and then read part of Psalm 139. He started weeping as he was reading and then I started crying and we stood there for a few minutes, just holding each other and crying. Then James prayed and after that I comforted Rachel who was crying uncontrollably. I'm sure it was quite a sight to see her Mom and Dad so sad. But what a good picture for the kids to see that this life is valuable and that we love him and this loss is difficult. It was hard, but it was good to bring closure and to honor little Elijah. He left this world too soon, according to our plan, but not according to God's.

This afternoon I got a good nap. I am trying to take it easy these next couple days. Today we took off school, but the kids will do school the rest of the week (as long as I am feeling well, as I have since the miscarrage). Two people are bringing us meals this week and tonight James is bringing home Chinese (a rare treat). It will be a good way to end this day of mourning our loss and celebrating his life. The kids will probably never forget this day and we pray that this lesson of how precious the unborn are will stick with them for their lifetime.

God is Good

I went to my ultrasound today and my suspicion was confirmed. I wasn't surprised to hear "no heartbeat". The baby measured about eight weeks. That's about when my morning sickness stopped. I think God has been preparing me this last week for this news. We are sad, but I have such a peace. The baby must have died in this last week and I believe God gave me insight into this. I knew something was wrong with the baby. I prayed for God to take the baby, if I wasn't going to carry to term or if there was something wrong with the baby, so that it would not live. I feel He has answered that prayer and I am thankful. I'm thankful for all His blessings in my life. I just got off the phone with the doctor's office and they said my levels were great (hcg and progesterone). They want to do a repeat test on Monday to make sure the baby is gone. I pray that before then my body takes care of him (we'll assume he was a boy) on it's own. Thanks to all of you who have prayed and continue to pray for us through this sad time.

Sometimes it is Good to be Wrong

Yesterday morning I came to the conclusion that my uterus is too small. I thought for sure the baby had stopped developing and died a couple weeks ago. My morning sickness dissapated a couple weeks ago and that is too early for me. I was able to get in to see the doctor this morning. The doctor said my uterus was about normal for 11 weeks, but we couldn't hear the heartbeat (also not unusual for this age). Then the doctor did an ultrasound to see if he could see a beating heart. He did see one, to my surprise (and delight), but he did say the baby was small and that I must have had my dates messed up. I could only be off by a week at the most. I suspect my dates are right (I double checked them this morning). Next Thursday I will get a real ultrasound and we'll go from there. I'm at peace with whatever happens. I know God is in control and I trust him. I was prepared for the possibility of having a miscarriage this weekend and now I have hope that I won't for now.

Questions

For a while now we've often used questions at the dinner table that help us share what's going on in each other's lives. We don't do it every night, in fact, we used to do it more than we have been lately. The two questions we do are "What is your high for the day?" and "What is your low for the day?". The kids love going around and sharing about their day. This past week I heard about some new questions to ask. This is in light of a study on churched youth. Fourty to fifty percent of youth from good churches end up turning away from their faith after high school. I sure would like to keep that from happening with our own youth. It can start now, while they are young. As adults, we need to be sharing our own personal walk with Christ with our kids. So in light of that, here are some questions we are going to start asking at the dinner table on a regular basis:

"How have you seen God working today?" and "What mistake have you made today?"

I think these are great questions to open up communication on spiritual matters. The kids will see Mom and Dad aren't perfect and we need to rely on God's grace. They also see how God is working in our lives. I also think the mistake question is good for those kids who think they never do anything wrong. They can see that we all mess up and it is okay. God's grace covers our sin.

Also, do your kids know how you came to faith in Christ (if you are a believer)? Many kids don't know their parents' testimonies. It would be good to share it with them.